This is one of those days I wish I weren't here.  It is the day where everything gets fucked up and there is nothing I can do about it.  I have a feeling that I'm losing everyone and everything.   I was doing good with gambling and then poof I fucked that up.   I lost too much.   I'm just a fuck up.  

I'm going on about 3 hours of sleep or so, not really sure what time I fell asleep, all I know is that I have to work my ass off tonight to finish that fucking paper for provang.  

On top of the shit storm I forgot Cara's gift.  I really hope she likes it, well I know she will like it, I just hope she doesn't have it.  But the way my day is going I wouldn't be a bit surprised if she has it.  

School is also furthering this once held idea that I should not go to school for any art forms.